Now Playing Tracks

Misplaced Anger

Feeling angry and self injurious. I know it had nothing to do with my nails but that is what set off my anger and frustration. Tried to do my nails and I failed more times than I can count on both fingers and toes, so I took off all my polish and gave up. I hate my misplaced anger. I feel like banging my head into the wall over and over. I feel like throwing things, breaking things and kicking and screaming. I feel like breaking a limb. I feel like sticking my finger down my throat. I’m starving and I’m SO ANGRY that I feel like being self injurious!

People always say “Treat others how you want to be treated”. Do you realize that that includes your kids? It may come back to bite you in the ass later. If you wouldn’t disrespect your neighbor or your best friend then don’t disrespect your child and when you do SAY SORRY! Unless of course you don’t feel any remorse for picking your child apart every time you’re angry with them.

I didn’t get time to grab lunch today to bring to work. So I didn’t get breakfast OR lunch today. 😩 and there’s never anyone to bring me one and I haven’t eaten since lunch yesterday. I’m glad all the people in my life can be counted on for anything. NOT!

Today is one of those days where I simply feel like I cannot possibly go on. I don’t know how I am possibly going to survive the next couple weeks. I only have $20 to my name. Plus next paycheck I have so much stuff to pay and I can’t miss out on Omaha because I only get to see the Z’s and Brookers once a year! I almost need a second full time job just to survive. I can’t do it. I just want to die. It’s so much easier.


  1. Stay with us and keep calm.
    The last thing we need when we’re panicking, is to have someone else panicking with us.

  2. Offer medicine if we usually take it during an attack.
    You might have to ask whether or not we take medicine- heck, some might not; but please, ask. It really helps.

  3. Move us to a quiet place.
    We need time to think, to breathe. Being surrounded by people isn’t going to help.

  4. Don’t make assumptions about what we need. Ask.
    We’ll tell you what we need. Sometimes; you may have to ask- but never assume.

  5. Speak to us in short, simple sentences.

  6. Be predictable. Avoid surprises.

  7. Help slow our breathing by breathing us or by counting slowly to 10.
    As odd as it sounds, it works.

1. Say, “You have nothing to be panicked about.”
We know. We know. We know. And because we know we have nothing to be panicked about, we panic even more. When I realize that my anxiety is unfounded, I panic even more because then I feel like I’m not in touch with reality. It’s unsettling. Scary.

Most of the time, a panic attack is irrational. Sometimes they stem from circumstances — a certain couch triggers a bad memory or being on an airplane makes you claustrophobic or a break up causes you to flip your lid — but mostly, the reasons I’m panicking are complex, hard to articulate or simply, unknown. I could tell myself all day that I have no reason to be having a panic attack and I would still be panicking. Sometimes, because I’m a perfectionist, I become even more overwhelmed when I think my behaviour is “unacceptable” (as I often believe it is when I’m panicking). I know it’s all in my mind, but my mind can be a pretty dark and scary place when it gets going.

Alternate suggestion: Say, “I understand you’re upset. It is okay. You have a right to be upset and I am here to help.”

2. Say, “Calm down.”
This reminds me of a MadTV sketch where Bob Newhart plays a therapist who tells his patients to simply “Stop it!” whenever they express anxiety or fear. As a sketch, it’s funny. In real life, it’s one of the worst things you can do to someone having a panic attack. When someone tells me to “stop panicking” or to “calm down,” I just think, “Oh, okay. I haven’t tried that one. Hold on, let me get out a pen and paper and jot that down, you jerk.

Instead of taking action so that they do relax, simply telling a panicking person to “calm down” or “stop it” does nothing. No-thing.

Alternate suggestion: The best thing to do is to listen and support. In order to calm them down without the generalities, counting helps.

3. Say, “I’m just going to leave you alone for a minute.”
Being left alone while panicking makes my heart race even harder. The last thing I want is to be left by myself with my troubled brain. Many of my panic attacks spark from over-thinking and it’s helpful to have another person with me, not only for medical reasons (in case I pass out or need water) but also it’s helpful to have another person around to force me to think about something other than the noise in my head.

Alternate suggestion: It sometimes helps me if the person I’m with distracts me by telling me a story or sings to me. I need to get out of my own head and think about something other than my own panic.

4. Say, “You’re overreacting.”
Here’s the thing: I’m not. Panic attacks might be in my head, but I’m in actual physical pain. If you’d cut open your leg, no one would be telling you you’re overreacting. It’s a common trope in mental health to diminish the feelings or experience of someone suffering from anxiety or panic because there’s no visible physical ailment and because there’s no discernible reason for the person to be having such a strong fear reaction.

The worst thing you can tell someone who is panicking is that they are overreacting.

Alternate suggestion: Treat a panic attack like any other medical emergency. Listen to what the person is telling you. Get them water if they need it. It helps me if someone rubs my back a little. If you’re in over your head, don’t hesitate to call 911 (or whatever the emergency services number is where you are). But please, take the person seriously. Mental health deserves the same respect as physical health.


I struggle with my diagnosed Anxiety/Panic Disorder. Mental Health deserves the same respect as physical health.

I hate today. I hate everyday really. 90% of the time I don’t feel like I have any friends and then my friend with families are like oh me too UMMMM did you forget at least you have a significant other and/or a child and I literally spend a majority of my time COMPLETELY ALONE. Half the time I wanna be like YOURE AN AWFUL FRIEND BECAUSE YOURE NEVER THERE FOR ME EVER and don’t ever talk to me again. Just one of those moments where I wish I was dead. Sometimes I seriously do not want to continue living. Today is one of those days. I want to just die.

We make Tumblr themes